Look at me all participating & stuff!

To help me with my mojo-malfunction I decided to link up with Mama Kat’s (pretty much worldfamous) Writer's Workshop. 

This week's suggestions were fun to think about but my ultimate decision was really a no-brainer.

I mean, why would I tell you all about how I am in love sweet love with both Jim Parsons and Jon Yumm Hamm but how I would eventually have to break their hearts by running away to marry Zach Galifiankis, or how 31 years after the fact I can still smell the vomit on my Miss Piggy pillow-sham just by thinking about liver & onions, when I finally have the opportunity to throw a pity party over the 2 things I always wanted for Christmas as a kid but never got?

Technically, the writing prompt is 10 things I Wanted for Christmas as a Kid but Didn’t Get and Still Want. (inspired by Hello Giggles) ~ but I don’t think I ever wanted 10 things at one time.

My brother & I grew up in the 80’s as children of baby-boomer consumers. There wasn’t much that we wanted that they didn’t already want to get for us. I’m not kidding you when I say that I had no freaking clue what an Atari was when we woke up to find Santa had brought us one. My parents were always way ahead of us on all the cool stuff. 

Unfortunately, the appeal of electronic-y stuff was lost on me. Save for "the 2 things", I was happy with my Rubiks cube and the giant Barbie head that I could put make up on.

In my day, Babs looked alot like a $2 version of Dolly Parton. 

Long before there were Razor Scooters there were Honda Kick’n’Go’s. They looked very similar to the scooters these days except they had this lever thing on the back & you used your foot to pump it & propel yourself as fast as you wanted to go. Yet another feature lost on me. You see, I have always been a creature of comfort - not necessarily speed or um, agility. My dad built custom motorcycles back then & they sold them in his shop and so naturally he thought we had to have them. Although I eventually got it together with the whole hand/foot coordination required to not crash, I'm pretty sure Dad still got the bigger Kick out of watching us Go. 

So what was it that I always wanted but never got? (Is it just me or can you guys hear my husbands voice saying "GET TO THE POINT ALREADY!" too?) 


Fine. What I always wanted was a

Lite Brite and a Cabbage Patch Kid.

But I never got either one.

My mom thought Cabbage Patch dolls were “ugly”. This is a woman who dressed me in rabbit fur coats at the age of 8 (pre-PETA & the red paint). Ugly in her world was (and still is) a crime.

The Lite Brite was “messy”. All those little black dots of construction paper & light bits made her shudder. Let's not talk about the fact that her favorite child my brother had a crap-ton of Lego’s that were often scattered everywhere or how he would purposely land-mine them along my bedroom doorway at night so that I would unavoidably step on them barefoot, in the dark, on my way to the bathroom at 2am. 

So yeah. No authentic adoption certificates or brightly lit displays of art for me. Because, you know, Ugly & Messy! 

Atari Pong induced coma's and Kick and Go scars on the chin, elbow, knee's & knuckles? Pure childhood FUN! 


Hours of quiet, creative time or honing my motherly instincts? 
Ugly & messy.

Years later they would use these same words to describe my boyfriends.  


My brother is now an architect in Anchorage, Alaska. Naturally my mother credits this to his Lego days. By that reasoning, I could have been Angelina Jolie if only she had let me adopt a stinkin' Cabbage Patch Kid!

Keep Calm & Carry A Camera

I took this last month when the leaves had begun to change.

The industrial park where I work is actually a very pretty, very woodsy & very critter filled area that also encompasses an historical landmark from the Civil War era.

A few weeks ago there was a movie crew camping out for awhile while they filmed scenes for a new motion picture about Pocahontas, she’s from this part of Virginia.

Big deal.

You know what they should have been filming?

A remake of Alfred Hitchcock’s THE BIRDS. That’s what.

(insert freaky music & bird squawking noises here)

Yesterday I was coming back from lunch when I saw these guys chillin on a lamp post:

Then I noticed the rest of them:

 Of all the times I’d wished I’d had my real camera with me to capture something really pretty and instead I capture TURKEY VULTURES.

DID YOU HEAR ME? I SAID VULTURES!!!!!!!!

I won’t lie. I stayed far enough away, in my car, with the window rolled down only enough to give the lens a clear shot.

This one tried to punk me:

I swear he started posing too. He was kind of hopping like maybe he was hurt or trying to line dance (you never know in Virginia) so I inched the window down just a tad more so I could get a closer & that bastard spread his wings & took flight at me! Ok, not at me, but over the car. Still, it scared me so much that I accidentally pushed the button to roll down the back windows instead of rolling up the front window. 

It’s a good thing I didn’t have to pee. Just sayin'.

Wiki says they are a protected species, even though they are known to carry anthrax (ANTHRAX!!) and hog cholera. I'm not sure what hog cholera is all about but it sounds detrimental to my bacon consumption. Not cool. 

You know what else I learned from Wikipedia about Turkey Vultures? That when they feel threatened they regurgitate on their attacker & feign death. Oh my god, ME TOO!!

Maybe I should star in the remake?

Pictures

Remember how I told you my husband has a tool bucket? Well, the truth is, he has TWO. And he prefers the buckets to the box in the back. I can only attribute this to his native american roots - he is (by way of his mother) half Pomo Indian (a small tribe of basket weavers in back home in NorCal). Maybe his inner Dances With Tools feels the bucket is more akin to a basket? I don't know. Sometimes there is just no explaining the male species.

This next picture has nothing to do with anything except that I loves it. How can you not love banana splits and pedicures? I attended this holiday luncheon gig at The Great Wolf Lodge last week and found this little spa adjoining the grown up ladies spa. So the seats are not exactly comfy (or roomy) enough for my derriere, but what they lack in backside support they more than make up for in adorableness.

~cliche title here~

Out with the new, in with the old!

Eh.

Everything old is new again?

Hmph.

Look, I tried. I thought what was killing my mojo was feeling haunted by nosy old busybodies so I started a fresh blog. Turns out – fresh starts are overrated and overwhelming. I couldn’t pull off the consistency of posting to establish myself. So here I am again.

Mary Engelbreit says “Wherever You Go, There You Are.”

She’s right.

Of course, she also says crazy stuff like “Life is just a chair of bowlies”.  Um...what does that even mean?

I’m pretty sure we can all agree that Forrest Gump is far more accurate in his statement that “Life Is Like A Box Of Chocolates”…..until you try! And that’s what I did. I tried. And now I’m baaa-aaack.

~~~

So who’s ready for Christmas? I’m not – at least not in the sense of getting the gift part accomplished.

I started getting into the spirit about Thanksgiving time and started making some stockings. Cute & easy peasy. Well, easy peasy except for the one with “the toe”. That one made me cuss & rip seams. Even so, holiday cheer was starting to seep into my psyche.

And then the stupid car threw a hissy fit. It’s all my fault.

You know how they say not to say certain things out loud because giving voice to them pretty much activates it? (Think: Wonder Twins) Well, there was this one day that gas had gone down to $3.09/gallon (dirt cheap in there here parts) so, being the very grown up person that I am (shut it), I decided to fill ol’ Miss Daisy all the way up. 


As I was pulling away from the gas station my dashboard was telling me I had 396 miles to go until empty. First I was all, “HOLLA! I can get back & forth to work all week without any gas pitt-stops, go me!” And then I was all, “watch this thing break on a full tank”. And then it did! That bitch broke.

Well, not like right there dead in its tracks or anything. I mean, made it the 25 miles to work, pulled into my usual spot, turned it off, and then it broke. I sat and watched a cloud of smoke (or steam, whatever) billow from under the hood. You’d a though Snoop Dogg was up under therrre!

I cried and called Craig and got mad at him, as per The Wife how-to manual. 

·         Me: *sob* The car is *sob* broke.

·         Him: I can’t hear you.

·         Me: *sob* The car is *sob* BROKE!

·         Him: I still didn’t hear you, you’re breaking up, are you...
                                        ~CLICK~

·         Me: *The clicking was me. I hung up on him. Oh come on! He couldn’t hear me, what was I supposed to do?*

He called me back but I didn’t answer. What if I had been stranded on the side of the road somewhere? Hello, I needed him to be worried!! So I waited until the 3rd ring of his 2nd phone call  - and then I answered. It's all about timing people. 

·         Me: *SOB!* HELLO! CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW?

·         Him: Yes, calm down, whats wrong?

·         Me: Are you SURE you can hear me? Because I don’t have all day for you to go get a hearing aid…

·         Him: I can hear you, what is wrong?

·         Me: The car is broke. There’s all this smoke wafting out from under the hoo-oood *sob*…

·         Him: Is it smoke or is it steam?

·         Me: How am I supposed to know? It’s like I’m sitting to close to the stage at a KISS concert and I’m scared shooting flames are up next! What if it EXPLODES?

·         Him: It’s not going to explode.

·         Me: It might. You don’t know. I filled it all. the. way. full of gas this morning.

·         Him: It won’t explode.

·         Me: You are gonna feel so bad if it does.

·         Him: Go inside, I will see you in a little while.

Later in the day he arrived with his tool bucket. That's right, tool (old 5 gallon paint) bucket.

He has a tool box.

He brought his tool bucket.

But I can’t pick on his in good conscience at this point because the man is like House, M.D. when it comes to diagnosing cars. Pure genius. He figured out what I needed to do to make it to work & home all week until he could do the major repair that weekend. I knew he could do it!

Now if only I could find a way to speak a million bucks into my bank account….

~~~

Summertime

I hope everyone is enjoying a fabulous summertime! 

We haven't done much more than use our Busch Gardens for summer entertainment this year. Seems like we've become the "stay-cation" types since moving to Virginia. I don't mind so much, but I do miss hopping in the car and heading north into the mountains around Lake Tahoe or west to the city streets of San Francisco or south to see family. I always loved that a 2 hour car trip in any direction could land you in a completely other landscape but still be in California. 

Not to pick on Virginia at all, it has some really beautiful aspects. And tons of history. DC has become a favorite car trip. But we sure are a long way from any mountains & for some reason we've all got the camping bug. 

Friends & coworkers have praised a local nature reserve for its camping fun. But honestly? I am not packing up the car just to drive 20 minutes to sleep outside. I drive farther than that to get to work everyday! It wouldn't feel like we "went" somewhere, you know?

So we're on the hunt for a real camping excursion. Somewhere under 2 hours. Charlottesville maybe? 

Anyone else have vacation or staycation plans?

Peace & Cupcakes Pillowcase Dress

Meet my Monday night project: a little trial and error (mostly error) dress I named "Peace & Cupcakes"....

Firstly(?) & most importantly you should know I bought this really stinkin' cute pattern called "Sew Easy" Pillowcase Dress from Foot Loose & Fancy Free on ETSY. You gotta love it! I really hope to someday do it justice. As those of you with keen sewista eyesight may notice my armpit armholes needs some work as do my bias tape making skills. 

Cross your heart promise not to judge this awesome pattern by my first attempt! 

{IMPORTANT: Pics of the way I added my border hem are not part of her pattern for I would not take liberties with the designers rights by so blatantly posting photos of her hard work! And I'm serious as a heart attack about that. Its simply the way I was taught to put a border on a pillowcase to "trap" the raw edges inside the casing & so I began with what I knew how to do in an attempt to personalize & doll up my version.}

LOVE the pattern so much I put it in page protectors & cute pink flex-folder :)

Mid-roll (after stitching on cupcake border)

then closing it all up inside....

....and pulling it out the ends....

And Voila! Wait. Stop the music. I totally sewed it UPSIDE DOWN. Crap...
Ok, so those errors I mentioned? Well there's one major one that turned a size 5 dress turned into a 4T. I cut that  border off & started over the right way! Then I got down to the business of following the pattern & here is my outcome:

{{{ TRUE LOVE!!! }}}

Like I said, the armholes need some work and I know won't win any Project Runways for Rugrats anytime soon but I'm still having a ball!

Lazy Sunday

It's Sunday afternoon, technically evening, and I'm sitting here bored. How lame is that? I don't think I've been really and truly bored in a very long time. But I am. And even though I normally think that only boring people get bored, I'm not going to think that right now. Because it's me. 


Friday I sewed myself a little purse/bag/market tote thingy from 4 fat quarters. I like it plenty but I can now see the importance of lining. It's reversible so I don't mean that kind of lining, I mean the kind that makes something stiffer. Interfacing? Don't laugh, learning to sew means also learning a whole new language.

Kiddo would only hold it long enough for a snap of the BlackBLURRBerry

Yes, blurry,but couldn't have you miss this awesomeness.

Saturday I met up with a couple of crochet friends at a coffee shop in the cute little downtown area. I made a coaster. One. Whole. Coaster. I know, watch me go! Meanwhile one friend was working on a double stand stadium in blanket in Redskin colors (and I'm still friends with her, see how tolerant I am?) and the other was trying to master a very confusing crochet pattern for a blanket she wants to make for her first grandchild - a girl due later this year. I hope I didn't intimidate them with my hardcore coaster. 


Also on Saturday I tried to have a yard sale. I sold a boppy cushion to the neighbor kid for a buck for his cat Sonya. And then I gave away a couple of books to his cousin. Donald Trump is dying to get me on The Apprentice. 


Our street ends at the beach less than 2 blocks down. We have foot traffic all day long every day. Yesterday? A perfectly sunny beach weather kind of day? None. Nary a stroller pusher or dog walker or bike thief (ahem, there's a story there I'll share sometime). I thought I was being very entrepreneur'ish by choosing lots of great beach reading material to sell. But no. Well, I mean I DID, but I can't help it if no one was smart enough to stop by for a bargain priced book. 


Yeah. So I packed that in early and spent most of the rest of the day flipping magazine pages in search of something inspiring. I fell asleep.


Of course now that I am sitting here on the front porch not having a yard sale, there are tons of people wandering past. They probably think I'm a geek sitting out here on the computer but the truth is, its the only place we can get wifi at the moment. It's an 81 year old house. It has mood swings. 


There is music at the beach tonight, like most Sunday nights thru the summer. I think they call it Groovin By the Bay. I call it Pick Up Your Trash When You Leave And Please Obey The Stop Signs Jerks! I think my name has a catchier ring to it don't you?


I decided blog hopping would be my best bet for finding inspiration. You guys in blogland never fail to amuse and inspire me. 


But before I go, here are some snapshots of those cherry curtains I made for my kitchen (which I LOVE LOVE LOVE): ((((PS: is it just me or has Blogger been especially sucky with the uploading of pics lately??)))) (((((PSS: Forgive my extremely low quality photo skills. Someday I will learn wield a camera!)))))

This last one I winged without a pattern - just your basic valance with an edging like the on pillowcases. Pretty much how I've been making all the curtains around the house so far. Easy peasy - just take the measurement of the width of your window & double it in fabric. 

And for anyone who cares, my seams are bitchin! Cleaaan & neat, no raw edges, everything folded & stitch or "French" seamed. Next project I will take crappy pictures of the insides too.

Ch-Ch-Ch-Cherry Curtains!

Well I did it. I officially turned 39 today. And guess what? I didn’t turn into a pumpkin or grow a wart on my nose. In fact, I'm happy to report it feels just like 29...but with 10 years experience. ;)

I was reading some blogs earlier & I’m suddenly fascinated with how other sew enthusiasts have their sewing rooms set up. Pretty cool! I’ve turned my dining room into my little sewista studio because it’s smack dab in the heart of the house. Even if I had my choice of one of the four bedrooms, I do believe I would still choose this very spot.

Sometimes on a Friday night I like to sort through my things, touch all the fabrics, flip thru craft magazines and fill my mind with ideas to sleep on. It helps me erase the week and get focused on what the hubs likes to call my “Anti-Sewcial Saturdays”.  (My guess is if the man knew just how quiet my motor mouth would become while sewing, he’d have bought me a machine years ago!)

Tomorrow (after breakfast out with my oldest son!!)  I’ve got plans to make kitchen window valances with the black/dot/cherry & the black/white gingham/cherry….I love these two fabrics, especially together! 

What I'm not so in love with is how Mr. Jones, ever the 80's hairband fan, feels the need to bust out in song with "Sheeee's my cherry pie..." whenever he see's it laying out. You think that will wear off once they are hanging? Gawd, I hope so. 

I also love this rose print which has no name but I found it super cheap at Hancock:

So feminine, the background is creamy colored, and although it's just cotton, it's very silky smooth. Not sure what to do with it since its just one yard. I wonder  if there is a book or website that shares 1-yard-only-ideas?

Have you tried Mary Ellen's Best Press? It’s the bestest. It gives fabric body without buildup or shine. It’s a little pricier than starch, but worth it. I've had it a few months and only use it sparingly, so it's lasting me longer than anticipated. I chose unscented. You can also get it in lavender, citrus, cherry blossom, & I think linen. Also purchased as Hancock:

 Sweet Dreams kids!

39 Things To Do In My 39th Year

So I’ve decided that since this 39 thing is happening despite my feelings about it then I may as well jump on board. Plus, I thought of another way to look at it: I’m pretty damn young when you consider I have an almost 20 year old son. Look, I’m no an advocate for having a child at 19 but I’m pretty positive my first born saved me from the kind of lifestyle that reality shows are famous for.

The following are 39 things I’d like to do in my 39^th year. Some may seem a little silly to you but keep in mind they are meant to be attained in a years’ time by a full time working wife & mama. For the most part they are things that I usually talk myself out of for various reasons….

In no particular order:

1.       Learn to sew with something besides cotton

2.       Learn to sew a dress for myself

3.       Hand make Christmas gifts for friends

4.       Get on the Griffin at Busch Gardens

5.       Go to the Outerbanks of Carolina

6.       Host a dinner party

7.       Paint our bedroom

8.       Get a new tattoo

9.       Wear high heels more often

10.   Wear flip flops less often

11.   Buy myself some new Ugg boots in the fall

12.   Get a new exercise ball

13.   Learn some tummy control yoga moves

14.   Support a local charity with hand made items

15.   Sky-dive??? Hubby wants to. I’m not so sure.

16.   Participate in a craft show event

17.   See Josh Groban at the Norfolk Scope

18.   Fly home to California for a visit

19.   Visit Dollywood

20.   Take the Hampton Roads boat tour

21.   Re-pierce the top holes in my ears

22.   Get an adjustable dress form mannequin

23.   Get a new computer

24.   Get an iPod touch that is mine, all mine

25.   Make my cubicle at work a little more inspirational

26.   Get pretty new bedroom furniture after #7 is complete

27.   Go apple picking again at Carters Mountain in Charlottesville

28.   Can homemade apple butter

29.   Be a better blogger

30.   Finally take advantage of the Bath & Body Works coupons I keep getting

31.   Get new winter coat – whatever suits my fancy, not just what’s on the sale rack

32.   Update from a Blackberry to an Android

33.   Take a quilting class or workshop

34.   Host a giveaway on my blog

35.   Start collecting windchimes

36.   See if I can get my 3 boys to sit on Santa’s lap just one more time for a pic together (by then they will be 20, 17, & 11)

37.   Go to a fancy spa for a deep tissue massage

38.   Order lobster and see what all the rage is about – just don’t make me choose from the tank, I’ll cry

39.   Drop 20 pounds before turning 40!!!

*********

PS:

This is my office chair:

It is ergonomically designed to relieve pressure on stress points in the body. 

Right. 

It feels like I'm sitting on patio furniture all day. 

Plus? 

ITS SEE THROUGH FOR CRYING OUT LOUD. 

You know what I think? I think it needs a cover. Except I'm not quite sure where or how to begin with that particular task. 

Right now it's only redeeming feature is that I just saw Sheldon sitting in the exact same chair on an episode of Big Bang Theory. I heart Sheldon!

Even so. I'm still totally covering mine & adding a cushion just as soon as I figure something office appropriate out. Sorry Sheldy-luv. Mama's tush needs more cush. 

If You're Awesome & You Know It, Clap Your Hands

That’s what I always say! Well, actually this is my first time saying it but who’s counting? The point is, if you are awesome, start clapping & give yourself some credit.  

I’ve been working my way through an exorcism a reinvention and I’ve found incredible strength and inspiration in this poem - which I always thought was by Nelson Mandela but when googling for the sake of this post learned the real author might actually be Marianne Williamson:

Our Deepest Fear

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. 

Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. 

It is our light, not our darkness

That most frightens us.

We ask ourselves

Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?

Actually, who are you not to be? 

You are a child of God.

Your playing small 

Does not serve the world. 

There's nothing enlightened about shrinking 

So that other people won't feel insecure around you.

We are all meant to shine, 

As children do. 

We were born to make manifest 

The glory of God that is within us.

It's not just in some of us; 

It's in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine, 

We unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. 

As we're liberated from our own fear, 

Our presence automatically liberates others.

"Your playing small does not serve the world" ~ The entire poem is sheer genius but that line in particular just resonates. I just want to stick this to bathroom mirrors everywhere so everyone will read it....because I'm pretty sure everyone you ask will say they never tire of feeling its power everytime. 

I'm in a good place emotionally, creatively, spiritually, and employmentally (oh yeah, mama got her old job back!) and I just want to holler from the rooftop - err, make that the front porch, have you seen the roof on this place? 

Anyways, I'm not sure if its the fresh start or being around a ton of amazing people all day again or if its my impending birthday that gets the credit for my new groove - maybe its all three. All I know is I've never been this happy while being this broke - LOL, still waiting on that first paycheck to hit my account. Going from a weekly pay period to bi-weekly takes some adjusting when it wasn't planned for. 

But we're low key people, we find entertainment in playing together or even just being near each other while doing separate things. Like when he's on the couch watching a race or golf and I'm at my sewing machine madly working away on valances and curtains for almost every window in the house. I'm like a crazy person now that I can sew window treatments! Two bedrooms and the laundry down, two more bedrooms and the kitchen to go. I won't mess with my living room - I can't  quite top the gorgeous French Country Waverly thats in there at the moment, but I'm working on it. 

Eventually I'm hoping to land a dress form mannequin so I can try my hand at clothes for myself. I'm falling hard and fast in love with the retro 50's housewife dresses - I wonder if I can pull that off? I may be more Ethel than Lucy in the size department so I'll need an adjustable one, but hubby just says I've got more to love on. Awwww....

Wait - rewind! He wasn't supposed to say that, he was supposed to say I'm totally a Lucy. Maybe I'll just start calling him Fred. Or Ricky Retardo. 

I can't believe it, but in a couple of days I will be entering the last year of my 30's. 

INSANE. 

I don't even want to say the number 39, it depresses me. 

I'm looking forward to 40 next year. 

40 sounds cool, I like it. 

But this 39 business is just weird. 

I'm not a girl, not yet menopausal. 

Hit it Britney!